


Morning Coffee

by Lady_Jane666



Series: The Bride of the Baptist - Side Stories, prompts and Oneshots [2]
Category: Far Cry 5
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Domestic Fluff, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff and Angst, non-deputy OC, soft John makes my heart happy okay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-11
Updated: 2020-10-11
Packaged: 2021-03-08 04:43:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,072
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26949928
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lady_Jane666/pseuds/Lady_Jane666
Summary: John and Mary Jane's first morning after moving into Seed Ranch.
Relationships: John Seed/Original Female Character(s)
Series: The Bride of the Baptist - Side Stories, prompts and Oneshots [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1879210
Kudos: 5





	Morning Coffee

**Author's Note:**

> This is honestly just self indulgent fanfic at it's best! It goes with this amazing art piece my friend helped me commission of John and MJ that you can find on my tumblr 

I am not someone who normally sleeps in as a rule, but the morning after our first night in the Ranch, Seed Ranch as it is now called I suppose, there was nothing that could have drug me out of bed with the sun. The twins did well enough with the move during the day but by the end of the evening they had let their pure displeasure for all the commotion be well known. They took turns fussing most of the night. Being very careful to take their turns, not being kind enough to give us both of them calm and sleeping at the same time 'til almost four in the morning This was obviously a coordinated effort on their part, even if they were only six weeks old. I had taken the brunt of dealing with the twins throughout the night, letting John try and get some rest as he had been doing the majority of the running in the previous few days. I thought it was the kindest thing to do, but I regretted deeply not being a far more selfish person. As much as the prospect of laying in bed all day was so very appealing to my still mostly asleep self, I knew that if I didn’t start moving soon I wasn’t ever going to. There were babies that probably were up or about to be. Not to mention a whole house that needed put together so we could actually live as comfortably as our new home should allow us to.

As I rolled over, I fully expected to stop halfway, being caught around the waist by a half asleep John. Like he had most mornings for the better part of the last decade. He would pull me back against him and nuzzle the back of my neck, softly asking me to stay with him just a little longer. Something he knew would only end up keeping me in bed for another blissful ten minutes, at least. Yet, on this morning I flopped over on my back to find a cold empty space. Instantly my half asleep brain started to panic. My hand blindly searched on his side of the bed, somehow expecting John to just appear out of thin air. As I pushed myself up, I opened my tired eyes and searched around the dim room. The curtains were still drawn, the bedroom door shut. It was quiet since the twins had come home. Quiet terrified me. I reached towards the end of the bed and pulled on an old lavender sweater that I had worn the night before as my eyes started to search around the room. The twin’s bassinets were at the end of the bed and the bathroom door was closed with the lights off. No sign of anyone inside. 

I ran my hands up my face as I rubbed the sleep from my eyes trying to will myself to be more awake than I was capable of at that moment. With a huff I tossed the covers off and instantly regretted it as soon as I remembered it was mid November. While the snow hadn’t started quite yet, there was enough of a chill in the morning the I pulled up my socks as I slipped on my weather old pink bunny slippers. My first thought was ‘check the babies..they are too quiet ’, so to the end of the bed I went. Much to my shock and honestly, a bit of pure terror thrown in there too, I found both of the bassinets empty. The panic that was already there because of John’s absence swelled to the point I could feel my chest begin to grow tighter as the first rush of pure anxiety took me over. “Where...are my babies?” I snapped so not awake enough for any of this.

Moving as quickly as I could, I raced out of the bedroom and saw the nursery’s door cracked open. Instantly I started to piece the strings together. “He wouldn’t have.. .” I muttered with the smallest hint of anger in my voice as I scurried into the room in search of my children.

Sure enough as soon as I walked in the room I spotted Lily’s pale pink sleeper and instantly I felt like I could breathe again. I turned to my left, and on the other side of the room Sam was fast asleep in his grey sleeper with his fingers in his mouth. I leaned over and reached into Sam’s crib and ran my hand over his thick dark hair. “Your daddy, damn near killed me with this…” I muttered, loud enough it had to have gotten picked up on one if not both of the baby monitors that sat in each crib. There was part of me that hoped John did hear what I had said. The whole thing scared me half to death. John should have known it would. 

I wasn’t what anyone would have called a calm and collected first time mother. I was frantic at times, scared of every new sound they would make. There was not a night where they had been home that I hadn’t gotten up at least once just to check they were still both breathing. We didn’t have the luxury of a nursery before, they had always been in the same room as me as I slept. John should have known that no matter how well intentioned the idea, I probably was not going to handle it all that well first thing in the morning. 

Letting out a ragged sigh I tried to remind myself that John didn’t do this to scare me or make me panic. He likely thought he was doing something really sweet and thoughtful. With a long deep breath in I reminded myself that John at times was rather impulsive, especially in things concerning our relationship. So I had to try and not hold onto the fact he scared me to death. Once I was slightly calmer, I checked on Lily who was happily asleep with her pacifier in her mouth. As it was most of the time. Lord help anyone who was around if it fell out and did not promptly replace it. My Lily-bear was without a doubt her father’s daughter. Quick tempered and with a hefty flare for the dramatics compared to Sam. 

Once I was assured they were fine, asleep in their cribs I felt like a weight had been lifted off my chest. I stood in the middle of their room for several minutes taking deep breaths in through my nose and exhaling heavily trying to calm myself down enough that I could walk out in search of John. I didn’t want to find him and still be on the edge. I wanted our first morning in this house to be a happy one. A fresh start. 

It took me several minutes longer than I expected to get myself calm enough that I was ready to go downstairs in search of John. I peeked into each crib before leaving just to reassure myself that they still were both in fact fine. 

As I walked into the hall, the glorious smell of fresh brewing coffee hit me first, followed by the smell of eggs cooking. Which for the first time in nearly a year, didn’t turn my stomach. Which honestly, was a victory of note all on it’s own. John was cooking breakfast for me. Years ago, when we both were still in school, he did often. Mostly because the one thing John could actually cook with any level of skill was scrambled eggs. Since Joseph had come back into our lives, he hadn’t done it once. 

“Oh he better be making breakfast…” I mumbled softly with a tired, half-hearted chuckle. There were many things that I had missed not having our own home. Privacy. Feeling like I had any manner of say in what went on. One thing I had not expected that I missed as much as I did was John cooking for me. Such a small thing, that I didn’t think about very much at all before the familiar smells hit me. With each step I took towards the kitchen, I could make out John muttering to himself about how he shouldn’t have put the babies in the nursery more clearly with each step. Instantly I knew he had heard me, of course he had. That's what I wanted after all, but I couldn’t help but feel a profound regret as I could make out the tone of frustration in his voice. I hung back just out of eyesight and listened to him as he chastised himself. 

“They are what, five weeks old? No, six...six weeks old.” John grumbled as I heard the pan scrape against the burner as he must have moved it. “What made me think they could be in their own room?” There was so much self doubt in his voice that I wanted nothing more than to go over to him and tell him I am sorry. That it really was sweet but I couldn’t will myself to move quite yet as John was now on a bit of a tangent. “What kind of father does that? Just takes their newborn children and puts them in a strange room in a new house? What the fuck is wrong me with?” I clasped my hand over my mouth to muffle ‘Oh, John’ as it tumbled from my lips not that John would have heard. He was too busy continuing his self loathing. “She has every right in the world to be furious with me really. I should have left her a note or something, but she was asleep… they were awake, I was awake. She was up all night with them. Wouldn’t taking the babies and letting her sleep be the right thing? Can I not even do this right as their father?” I could almost picture what had happened. It really was such a sweet and really very thoughtful thing to do. I cursed myself for being so angry at him not ten minutes before. He didn’t deserve it.

Before John spiraled down into a deeper pit of self loathing, I decided I needed to let him know I wasn’t mad at him. Not now that I was calmer and a little more awake. He was still distracted making, what I could only assume was our breakfast that he didn’t notice that I had walked into the kitchen at first. In fact, he didn’t notice I was there until my fingers glided across his back as I walked up behind him. John said nothing as he turned around to face me. I mustered my best still not fully awake smile as I reached stretching my fingers softly through his beard as I mumbled. “Morning…” I muttered as I tried to get him to lean down so I could kiss him but John wouldn’t budge. 

He gripped my hips, ignoring the sizzling food on the stove, as he gazed intently into my eyes. “Darling, I…” I knew everything he would say. How he would place all fault on his actions and not on my horrible half-asleep reaction, which really were the far worse of the two. 

I wouldn’t let him continue. “The two little bears are fine, I’m fine...we are all fine. ” I said, trying my best to be as calm and happy as I could. I reached up and pushed a few strands of his hair behind his ear. “Let’s just forget about it before you forget that you are cooking.” I chuckled softly as I pointed towards the now smoking pan on the stove.

John shook his head as he suddenly remembered what he was doing. “Shit..” he turned off the burner and looked at the eggs which had burnt in the few moments he was distracted. He tossed the pan back onto the stove with frustrated growl. “I was trying to make you breakfast…” I reached out and touched his arm in a vain attempt to calm him once more. It seemed to work for the moment. He let out a defeated sigh. “I really just wanted this morning to be like things used to be.” 

A warm smile grew across my still tired face. “Fuck the eggs John, Really. You made me coffee though, somewhere right or is my brain now playing very specific tricks on me?” I sighed trying not to laugh because John had seemed to put a good deal of effort into what I was expecting was going to originally be breakfast in bed. Something he hadn’t done in years. “Honestly babe, I am not even hungry right now.” John nodded half heartedly as I leaned back against the kitchen island. “At this point I would happily kill someone for a coffee…” There was enough humor in my voice for John to know I wasn’t entirely serious. Though in truth, it wasn’t that far off. I was beyond exhausted and needed caffeine desperately. 

“No felonies need to be committed..” John chuckled as he picked up a white coffee cup I hadn’t seen since we left Atlanta to show me. At first my eyes dashed to the open box on the floor next to him and the four others he had obviously gone through in search of these particular mugs. I turned my gaze back to the mug as he set it back on the counter. My eyes grew wide at the sight of it. It had been more than a year since I had packed it and the set of dinnerware that it went with away, to probably never see again. 

“That’s from the set…” I started my voice cracking with more emotion that I had expected. “The one that Sophie got for my bridal shower.” I was near tears at the sight of it as my hands went to cover my mouth as it hung open slightly. Sophie had been my best friend from middle school on and she would have been my sister-in-law if she hadn’t been killed the night of the bridal shower as she drove home. Struck by a drunk teenager who had stolen his mother’s car. I was devastated, Sean has never been the same. It was this dark cloud that hung over my wedding that my mother refused to concede to letting us push back because we had to have a spring wedding. Such simple mugs held more meaning to me than the finest crystal or expensive imported china. 

I sometimes forgot how incredibly thoughtful John was. It was my own fault. I let the harder times taint the fact that at his core John did love me and did actually care more about me than himself. John smiled softly as he turned around and began to pour me a cup. “I told you it was all in storage, where did you think Sean and Bobby were all yesterday afternoon?” My hands slipped away from my face as he turned around to hand me the cup of coffee. I smiled so widely my cheeks began to hurt as reached out for the cup. “Everything is here, Mary. I promised you this wasn’t going to cost us every part of our lives and I meant it.” 

I didn’t know if I wanted to cry or kiss him as my hands wrapped around the cup. In my hands was the most important piece of our old things, in our new home. For the first time since coming to Montana, I felt like this could truly become our home without losing every part of who we once were. John leaned down and placed a tender kiss on my cheek as his hand rested on my waist. I looked down at the cup of black coffee and grimaced at the thought of having to drink it black. I would not enjoy it as much but I absolutely would still drunk the coffee black. . I gave John a slightly nervous smile as I looked back up at him tilting my head ever so slightly. “What about…” I started to ask but John knew I was asking for coffee creamer before I could finish. He pointed to the fridge. I hadn’t put two and two together that at some point, somehow, groceries of some kind ended up in our house. “Please tell me you did not leave those babies to go to the store..” 

“No!” John laughed shaking his head. “I would never just leave them while you were asleep. Give me a little more credit than that, Darling.” He rubbed my arm as he smirked still shaking his head. “I used your rather large network of brothers like some kind of back woods delivery service.” Instantly I started laughing because I knew John would absolutely think of something like that in a pinch. “Listen all I did was call Sean, I woke him up obviously. He hasn’t seen a sunrise in his life. Sean ended up calling Jimmy apparently who woke up Bobby, who called Mac who was the only that was dressed and agreed to get us a few things.” I started to laugh even harder as I crossed over to the fridge and pulled it open. It wasn’t full, I still needed to go into the next largest town to get groceries, but there were basics and most importantly French Vanilla coffee creamer. Mac does in fact love me and knows me far better than he lets on. I made a mental note to thank him later. I turned back around as John shrugged, shaking his head. “Next time I need something before nine in the morning, I know just to call Mac…” John laughed. 

“Oh I could have told you that. Sean keeps vampire hours these days and Bobby...well I think since he moved out all he does is play Call of Duty and smoke weed. Which is also why Sean keeps vampire hours.” I set the coffee and bottle of creamer on the counter. “Really Jimmy or Mac are always the best one to get for things like this at any time of the day.” I fixed my coffee as John silently nodded making a mental note. I would have thought after the years of knowing my brothers that John would have figured out the lay of the land, but then again. We had never lived this far out in the middle of nowhere before or had two newborns either. So I couldn’t expect him to know just which brother to call to go get groceries at what I could only expect at what was dark’o’clock in the morning. 

As I took that first sip of coffee I felt just a little bit of bliss as the warmth ran through my body. “Oh… hello dark roast, french press made coffee… my old friend.” The pure joy in my voice made John laugh as he settled beside me as I looked out over the kitchen island out through the window into our ‘backyard’. I let out a soft sigh that nearly sounded like a moan as I took the second sip. 

This amused John, I caught the slightest glimmer of smirk playing on his lips as he moved behind me. “That is the same happy sigh you have after I make you cum…” He whispered as his hands ran under my sweater and up my stomach. He leaned down, his lips brushing against my neck as he pushed the wide collar of my sweater over my shoulder, exposing the start of what would become a sleeve of flowers that one day would cover my left arm. “I miss making you sigh like that…” he whispered, his voice thick with pent up lust from us having to put a full stop to all bedroom activities since before the twins were born. 

I let out a blissful sigh as I felt him press a kiss to my bare shoulder. “Two weeks, in theory if I healed well.” I remind him gently. “Two weeks and you can hopefully make me sigh, moan, preferably cry out in pure ecstasy.” John rested his cheek against my shoulder as he let out the heaviest and most defeated of sighs. 

“I love the twins, but they really have put a damper on our sex life.” John muttered. 

“Children tend to do that, even when there is only one of them.” I reached up and patted his cheek. He let out another sigh, his hands slipping away from me as he took a step back. “We just had to be overachievers and have twins out the gate.” I laughed before I smirked smugly as I glanced over at John who had settled next to me, leaned back against the counter so we were facing each other. His eyes narrowed on me before he shook his head not finding my little joke amusing. “Oh, don’t you shake your head at me.” I laughed again as I reached down and picked up my coffee cup. “You spent the entire time I was pregnant with them joking about me being pregnant with twins. You pretty much willed them into existence.”

“No, I just was continuing the joke that Sean started.” He retorted with a soft hint of actual amusement in his voice now. “I never expected in a million years we would actually end up having twins. They don’t run on either side of our families, at least that I know of.”

“Oh there are twins.” I snorted into my coffee cup. “My parents didn’t have them, but twins are not unheard of in MacKenna side.” John looked shocked like this was the first time he had heard any of this information but it wasn’t. “There were three sets of twins at our wedding, John…” His brow furrowed as he didn’t quite believe me. I scoff slightly and shake my head. “If you spent less time getting high with my brothers at our reception.” My words came out far more harshly than I had intended, but I wasn’t lying either. John spent the majority of reception running back and forth to Sean’s car with him and Bobby doing lord only knows what to get through the night.

John’s face dropped as it always did when I ever brought up our lives from before Joseph found us. “You did pretty much spend most of the reception by yourself..” He admitted. 

“Dealing with my mother, her fucking sisters and Colin..” The memory of that day was a touchy subject. While there were moments I didn’t want to forget. There was so much of my own wedding I wish could have been erased from my memory. John reached out and rested his hand on my hip. He had a deeply apologetic look as he tried to coax me to him. “John, I was gonna go outside and…” I stopped myself when John put his other hand on my hip and gently pulled me towards him. “John..” I protested softly as I tried to pick up my coffee cup but John had a hold of me before I could grab it. “I swear if my one cup of coffee gets cold…”

“We should get married again… renew our vows... “ He cut me off. He was so sincere as he spoke, I however was not about to relive the hellscape that was our wedding. 

“No.” I said bluntly. “We did the dog and pony show for my mother and aunts. We showed off how well off you were. We had the country club, the open bar and the fucking dresses…” I was already having the most violent wedding planning flashbacks and all that had I went through in preparation for that single day. “Not to mention the what, three crash diets my mother made me go on, the corset…” John chuckled softly as he reached up and brushed my hair off my face. 

“I liked the corset, if I am honest.” He smirked as he leaned forward to try and get me to kiss him but I shook my head. John ran his hand down over my bare shoulder, his fingers tracing the outline of the half finished tattoo he had start a year ago from one of my drawings. “Darling, our wedding was a disaster, and then some..” I nodded, unable to argue that point with him. “Good you agree.” He laughed and I tried to pull away to go get my coffee but John stopped me again. “The fact we both have more bad memories than good of that day is all more reason for us to do it.” I grimaced at the thought. 

The whole idea of another wedding horrified me. I let out a ragged sigh. “I just had the twins, I am never going to be that small again even if I wanted.” I gestured to myself. I promised myself after all the crash diets my mother had forced me to do to loose what she called those ‘pesky five extra pounds’ I had sworn off dieting all together. 

  
John ran a hand up my side pulling me just a little closer to him. He gazed down upon me with such reverence that it made me smile nervously as I shook my head before he even started it. “You are beautiful, you always have been and you all will be.” He meant what he said, I could tell simply by the soft, calm tone as he spoke. I couldn’t let myself believe it in the moment. Years of my mother constantly criticizing my looks wouldn’t allow me. I kept shaking my head and tried to push away from John. “Mary, I’m serious.” He cupped my cheek, his thumb brushing across my cheek. I smiled weakly up at him. “I like the way you look now more.” John stated emphatically. I scoffed and rolled my eyes trying once more to pull away from him.

“How? Why?” I questioned not believing him in the slightest as I pushed away from. “I have stretch marks from my crotch to my fucking tits. Which you know are never going to be the same…” I was saying everything I knew my mother would have and I think that was what hit a nerve with John. 

“Stop it,” John snapped as he reached out and took my hands. I tried to pull away again because this was not a discussion I wanted to have. “This isn’t some debate, Mary Jane. Your mother has your head so twisted, Darling. Don’t let her do this again.” I let out a long sigh as I turned away. “It’s just her Envy. You may not see it, but that’s all it is.” My bottom lip quivered. Without thinking, I took a step forward and wrapped my arms around him, holding on to him as tightly as I could. John held me just as tightly. 

We stood like that for what felt like hours but was not likely more than a few minutes before John mumbled. “Will you marry me, again?” I couldn’t believe at first that he was still so dead set on something a few months before we were both so dead set against. 

As I took a step back to look at him I couldn’t help but laugh at him just a little. It all felt completely absurd to me. “Did you really just propose to me?” I questioned raising one of my perfectly arched eyebrows. “John, do you not remember that you didn’t even propose the first time, you just took me to get the ring.” There was so much humor in my voice that my response confused John who looked almost hurt as I finally pushed away from him and snatched my coffee cup from the counter, spilling some of it on my hand. “Look… you made me spill.” I pursed my lips before I brought the coffee covered back of my hand to mouth and tried to salvage what caffeine filled goodness I could. “We are married already, our wedding was a shit show. A lot of people’s weddings were shit shows. We are far from the only couple to start what would turn out to be perfectly happy lives in spite of having horrible weddings.” I tried to explain as I finally started to make my way out to the back porch hoping he would just drop the subject. 

I should have known better. John was relentless, if he set his mind to something. He would get what he wanted. It’s what made him such an effective and sought after lawyer. So it was no surprise to me that John followed me out into the brisk morning air. It was mid November and I was only just slightly more dressed than he was. This renewal of our vows situation was obviously something that he wasn’t going let go of and it was pointless to push back. So when he wrapped his arms around my waist as I stood looking out over the property, my first instinct was to tell him to go back inside. None of this was really worth catching his death out in the cold. He, however, felt so warm pressed against my back as his arms wrapped around me holding me tightly. Making me feel so incredibly safe, loved and protected that I couldn’t bring myself to say a word. We stood in silence for several minutes, basking in the peaceful sounds of nature waking up as we had our own brief moment of peace. 

It was only just a moment though.

“Mary Jane..” John muttered softly into my hair. I knew he was going to ask and ask 'til I said yes. It was his way but I didn’t think this renewal was needed or would end well at all. “Marry me...again..” John asked once more as I fully expected he was going to, his voice barely more than a whisper. A weary sigh escaped my lips as I brought my coffee to them. “Please.” John added as I finally took another sip. A long frustrated filled that sigh seemed to coax the truth from John. “Is it so wrong of me that I want this all to be a fresh start.” He began. I slowly turned around as John let go of me. My deep blue eyes watched as he crossed his arms in front of his bare chest. ”I know I was not the man that you deserved when we got married. Colin had every right in the world to say what he said that day. I still don't deserve you”. 

“John, please…” I started but he shook his head, his thick dark hair falling into his face as he did so. 

“Let me finish, please…” As he began to try and find the right words he brought his left hand to rest over his heart. “Joseph has helped me see how corrupted by my own sins I was back then. I was selfish and cared only to make my own pain stop. Not thinking how it would hurt you.” I wanted to tell him Joseph was just twisting his head, just like my mother so often did but I knew pointing it out served little use. “I am not the man you married.” 

“No, you’re not..” I admitted softly. John had changed in some ways for the better. He was calmer, less impulsive overall. I couldn’t deny the small positive influence that both Joseph and Jacob had on him. I often wondered though, at what cost did these changes come. “Just because you have grown as a person doesn’t mean everything we had before didn’t mean something,” I sighed taking a step forward as I took another sip of my coffee collecting my thoughts. “If this is because it’s still Duncan on our marriage certificate..” 

“No, well… yes… but that’s not just the reason.” John admitted with a heavy sigh. “All I want is for us to be a happy family for Sam and Lily. I don’t want them to end up like me. Like my brothers. I don’t want any part of  _ them _ tainting our children.” I hid my pained look behind my coffee cup as I turned away. I knew it was going to come up at some point, John’s childhood was horrific from the very little I know of it and it was only a matter of time before us having children stirred up long forgotten about feelings. “I don’t ever want them to even know their fuckings names..” 

“Babe…” I started softly moving closer to him. “Sam and Lily will never know, never. I promise you that.” With a soft sad sigh I continued. “Really, we are a happy family, John. They are not going to grow up like we did always in chaos and bullshit.” I muttered trying to get him to just let this all go. “We won’t let it happen and you know it.” 

John shook his head. “It’s still there. They are still there.” 

“And how is renewing our vows going to change anything?” I asked softly taking a few more steps close to him.

I just wanted to go back into the house and let this all rest but John wouldn’t let it go. I don’t think he could even if he really wanted to. There was so much history there and that had shaped every part of him. He was alright some of the time, but times like this reminded how glad I was the Duncans were long dead. I smiled softly at him as I stopped for a moment in front of him before resounding myself to just go back into the house. John caught me around my waist and stopped me mid step. I nearly tripped as he pulled me to him, my now luke warm coffee splashing over the edge of the mug. His intense blue eyes locked on mine as his lips parted to speak. “Mary, please… all your family was there. I had no one… not a soul. I have my family back now, I want Joseph to marry us, I want Jacob to be my best man.” His words hit me harder than I was expecting. 

Honestly, I had never given the fact that John didn’t have family at our wedding any thought before that moment. My family had always been large enough to make up two normal sized families and I was more than willing to share. It was selfish of me, I suppose. John Duncan was this lone wolf. He didn’t need family, or he liked to put off that impression rather. John Seed, while technically the same man, he loved his family. For all their faults, John loved his brothers. 

With a heavy sigh I leaned down and set the coffee cup on the porch before turning to him. I reached up and took his face in my hands. There was no avoiding this. I was going to have to agree because the look of pure heartbreak on John’s face in that moment would haunt me for years to come. “You could have just said that you wanted to do it so you could have your brothers involved, John as much as I have my differences with Joseph at times. They are still your family, as much as Sam, Lily and I are.” I answered my voice soft and filled tenderness as I ran my thumb across his cheek. 

“So is that a yes?” I slowly nodded in response. “Really?” 

As much as I really loathed the idea of going through the whole ordeal a wedding brought with two very small children, and the idea of Joseph marrying us made me skin crawl. There was part of me that also knew that if I didn’t do this, John would slip further into his own head and it would be a dark cloud over our lives. “There are conditions to all this, alright.” I started my hands slipping away from his face. “I don’t want it to be anything absurd.” I pointed out my eyes locked on his as I spoke. “We had the massive wedding once and that was never what either of us really wanted.” John nodded agreeing with me as I walked back into the house, stopping to pick up my now cold half finished cup of coffee. Once inside I frowned as I set the now cold cup on the counter as I waited for John to follow, as I knew he would. As he was closing the doors, I continued trying not to show how frustrated I was with my coffee getting cold. I sighed as I walked towards him, “I want something small, only family. This is not going to be some big spectacle for all of the Project to come be a part of.” 

John grimaced as he reached out for me. “You know Joseph will want that, the convent is just finished and there hasn’t been any weddings since we came to Hope County.” I pouted, perhaps a little over exaggerated of a pout, as John draped his arm over my shoulder. “You know we have to make a good impression on the locals if we want to save as many people as possible.” I shook my head, so as much as I had believed this was a somewhat impulsive whim of his. It appeared there was at least some thought on his part to this. I suspected Joseph’s as well. 

“If he wants to put on a show, he can get married.” I muttered bitterly. I had my mother take over my first wedding. The last thing in the world I wanted for a possible second was for Joseph to take over. I knew that’s what would happen, but if it made John happy I would endure, just not silently. I wrapped my arms around his waist as I turned into him. “Just, promise me our new wedding is going to have one thing…” 

“Anything.” John laughed softly.

“Punch Colin again..” I smiled brightly up at him like I was the most innocent creature in the world. “It is my favorite memory of our first wedding.” 

John shook his head as he leaned down to kiss the top of my messy dark hair. “That really is your favorite memory of wedding day, isn’t it?” He asked, amused.

“It was glorious.” I laughed as I looked up at him my hair falling down into my face. John reached over with his free hand and brushed my hair out of my face. He let out a happy sigh as he saw the bright, broad smile across my lips. As he began to lean in to kiss me there was a shrill, high pitched wail from the baby monitor on the counter. 

“Sam?” John questioned raising his eyebrows as he tried to make out which one had woken up. 

I shook my head with a soft chuckle. The second I heard the cry I knew there was no way that cry was my Sammie, he wasn’t much of a fussy baby. Lily on the other hand, she was always just a moment away from a melt down. With a soft laugh I pointed to John. “That is your daughter…” John smirked and held in a light hearted chuckle as another high pitched wail crackled over the baby monitor. “Note that same flair for the dramatics..” A second, softer put far more purposeful cry came over the other monitor. “That is my little bear…” I frowned for a moment. “Lily always wakes Sam up and he hates it. He is such a quiet little bear.” 

John smiled warmly as he kissed the side of my head. “Lord knows where that even came from..” Lily let out another shrill screech. With a weary sigh John looked down at me. “Lily it seems has some rather strong opinions this morning.” John laughed softly as he moved his arm from my shoulder and took my hand instead. “I suppose we should go up stairs and check on them.” 

“I think that would be the responsible thing to do.” I laughed. 

We walked hand in hand up stairs to the twins nursery and sure enough they both were now wide awake and none too pleased about it. “Alright you two, you got the both of us up here…” John started as we walked in the room. Lily’s cries still overpowered Sam’s even in person. John turned to me and pointed towards Lily’s crib and I nodded towards Sam’s. Silently each picking a newborn to calm. Turning his full attention to Lily, John began to talk to her like she was just a very small person. “Lilith, is this all really necessary sweetheart?I know your pacifier fell out, which is just a horrible crime. I understand, but you woke your brother up, I don’t think that was the nicest thing in the world to do to him. What has Sam ever done to you? Huh?” 

I smirked listening to John talk to her as I leaned over the rail of Sam’s crib and rested my hand on his belly. “Did your sister’s temper tantrum wake you, little bear?” I asked softly before he shrieked back at me. “Oh I know little man,” I coo softly as I reached into the crib to lift him up. His little face scrunched up as he let out another cry of disapproval. “I know, the world is such a rough place. Mama is only making you get up because we have all sorts of things we need to do today.” I settled Sam down enough that he was resting his head now on my shoulder with his fingers in his mouth. 

John lifted up Lily and settled her against his shoulder making sure her pacifier was in its proper place. I hated that Lily had become so attached to the thing, but she did and I couldn’t do much about it yet. “I can’t believe all that over her pacifier falling out of her mouth…” John sighed as he glanced over his shoulder at us before turning all the way around and making his way across the room with Lily now much calmer. He smirked as I turned around so he could see Sam, with his big blue eyes wide open looking around the room. “Hey, buddy..” He smiled softly as he leaned over and kissed the top of Sam’s head. 

I turned around and peaked at Lily who was nestled against John’s chest, one of his tattoo covered hands cradling her head. It was such a contrast. This tiny, very dainty, pink covered baby and John, covered in tattoos and scars. I don’t think anyone besides me had expected him to become this very loving and attentive father as soon as the twins were born. I smiled over at them and watched as John slipped her pacifier back in her mouth when it began to fall out. “Her and those pacifiers though, she is going to cost a fortune in orthodontist visits and braces you know that.” 

“We have a fortune to spend, if need be and that’s a long ways away.” John scoffed as he looked down at Lily. His hand running over her thick dark hair, as he smiled down at her. “We probably have dance classes and at least one pony to get through before we have to worry about braces, right Princess?” 

I shook my head as I shifted Sam slightly into a more comfortable position for us both, “And what about Sam?” I pouted looking down at our son.

John laughed softly. “Sam can have whatever he wants. Toys, flying lessons, and hell he can have a pony too… we have the land.” I laughed softly and John looked up at me. “They aren’t going to want for anything, trust me.” 

“I think they need a puppy.” I muse softly as I look down at Sam who cooed softly. “See, Sammie thinks it a good idea, you want a puppers don’t you little bear?” I rocked back and forth with him as I smiled over at John. “He wants a puppy, daddy… the little bear has spoken.” 

The way John looked at me with this ‘are you serious’ expression painted across his face as he shook his head. “You have Salem..” John was right, I did have Salem though he was staying with Sean 'til we got the house situated. “The cat by himself is more animals that I would really like in the house…” 

My lips parted as I was a little surprised as John was one the one who had gotten me the kitten. “Salem needs a friend and how do we know that Lily and Sammie even like cats. They may like dogs much better.” I started to smirk as Sam cooed in my arms. With a shake of my head I turned away as I began to rub Sam’s back in soft circles trying to get him back to sleep. “You know we have all this space, it would be a disservice to our children to deprive them of having a farm dog.” 

“Mary Jane, we have newborn twins, you have a kitten who is barely six months old, you really want to add a puppy into this chaos?” 

“Have you met my family? I was born into chaos. It is all I know,” I laughed softly as John shook his head looking over at Sam who was starting to settle more and looked as if he was about to fall back asleep.

“In a few years when things settle and they are older.” John conceded. It was a small victory but one nonetheless. I turned back towards him and smiled at him. “When they are big enough they can help take care of the thing and I just don’t like the idea of having a rambunctious puppy in the house with them when they are so small.”

“They aren’t made of glass, even Sam.” I pointed out softly, even if I didn’t fully believe my own words at the time. “They are going to get bumps and scratches eventually.” 

“Not yet, alright.” John sighed. “Let me just pretend I can protect them from the rest of the world for a few years before that harsh reality sets in.” 

John really wanted to be the father he wanted growing up, the hero. The protector. It wasn’t something I had expected from him but it also made this part of my soul fall deeper in love with him. “Fine… Only because you are so good looking and I love you.” I laughed softly as I leaned over and kissed him. I let out a happy sigh as John leaned back smiling down at me. I knew I was going to have to put and end to this rather peaceful moment and throw us right back into the chaos of moving if anything was going to get done. I cleared my throat as I glanced down at Sam who was now back asleep, as well as Lily. “They fell back asleep…” I noted and John nodded slowly. “We should really get dressed and start on the house.” The fact I didn’t want to do this peppered every word. 

“We should… or we could go lay down with them for an hour or so, till Jacob and Mac come to help us unpack.” John suggested. It was such a beautiful suggestion too. I wasn’t tired, but I did just want to lay in bed with John. It was after all, my favorite hobby. Snuggling with John. I know it’s neither glamorous nor productive, but it made my heart happy in a way I can’t quite explain.

With a broad smile playing on my lips, I nodded my head. “I like that second option… much better.”

“I figured you would.” 

“My clever boy knows me so well.” I laughed and John chuckled as we walked out of the nursery towards our bedroom. As John pushed our bedroom door open with his foot I turned to him, having the most beautiful and sudden thought pop into my head.“Oh...does this mean since we are getting up again with the twins in an hour, I get to actually have a cup of coffee this time.” 

“Maybe even eggs too.” 


End file.
